There aren’t many great memories from when I was a child; to be honest I think trauma has blocked out a lot of it. I tend to see things in tiny shreds that float context-free in my brain, as opposed to a fluid, chronological wave. One of the positive shreds I do remember, is a quote from a book I read as a kid. I don’t remember it exactly but it was along these lines,
“I’ve always loved a fresh notebook and a new set of felt pens. The possibility of a clean and unmarked book with never before used pens is so exciting to me” – UNKNOWN
It resonated with me and still does to this day; I use it as a metaphor for life. It can be a fresh day, week, month or year. The possibilities before you crack the spine are endless and thrilling to think about.
My problem comes in if I make an error because then it feels like I’ve ruined the page for the day. I feel like my error is glaring, much like how your eye is instantly drawn to a crossed out word on a page, I feel my mistake is evident to everyone. I’ve been known to start a new notebook and completely re-write everything if I make one mistake. I no longer feel I have control over the day and must wait until the new one starts to try again (If it’s mid-week, I will often feel thrown off for the entire week).
This whole process is exhausting and very time-consuming. Then I got some wonderful advice in an email, saying to expect failure, to build it into my plans and goals for 2017 because if a mistake is allowed for, it stops the idea that you have been knocked off track. I was thinking, how many minutes have I wasted waiting for the counter to reset to zero? So this year I have one resolution, to embrace mistakes and failures as part of the ride and to understand a mistake does not discontinue all the effort I’ve already banked.
We are all humans and we all fuck up sometimes. Embrace the failure, learn from it, grow from it and know it’s all part of the tapestry of life. Also expect to fail at failing sometimes too (Ok, my brain hurts now).
That’s my battle cry going into 2017 (Granted its less intimidating than your traditional battle cry but I think it works. Also it’s hilarious to think of ten thousand men charging into battle screaming ‘We all fuck up sometimes’).
I’d love to know your resolutions, ideas, plans and goals for 2017.
Until next time,
Be kind to others. Be kind to you yourself.